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[–]ChestnutCritter 14 points15 points  (0 children)

[Intro] Wa, wa, wa Wa, wa, wa Who wants a muffin? Wa, wa wa Wa, wa, wa

[Verse 1] Ha, I’m a muffin And it’s muffin time Who wants a muffin? Please, I just wanna die

Hey, somebody kill me Please, it’s muffin time Have you had a muffin today? I wanna die, die, die

[Chorus] Please I wanna Die, die, die Die, die, die It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die Please I wanna Die, die, die Die, die, die It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die

[Verse 2] Die, potato, die I baked you a pie Oh boy, what flavour? Pie, pie, pie

Dad, I’m hungry Hi hungry, I’m dad Why did you name me this way? Why, why, why?

I’m gonna do an internet Well I’m gonna do a book You’re leavin’ me? I met a real man Hey buddy look

Over here Ha ha ha ha ha, now you’re blind You’re gonna die We’re all gonna die Ooh, a butterfly We’re all gonna

[Chorus] Die, die, die Die, die, die (Pie, pie, pie) It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die (Why, why, why) Please, I wanna Die, die, die (Ooh, a butterfly) Die, die, die (Hi, hi, hi) It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die

[Verse 3] Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee Got your nose Look out he’s got a nose! Is this you? (Yes) Hello! (Hi!)

Here comes the airplane I like trains Honey I’m pregnant I can explain

No! Don’t jump Okay, jump now I have no idea how to breathe Meow, meow, meow, I’m a cow

Hey, you got a license for that? You’ll never take me alive Ha ha! They said I could never teach a llama to drive No llama, no

[Chorus] Die, die, die Die, die, die (Pie, pie, pie) It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die (Why, why, why) Please, I wanna Die, die, die (No llama, no) Die, die, die (High, high, high) It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die

[Bridge: Sarah Fullen Gregory] Even though letting go feels right I can’t afford to say goodbye You and I are bound together Especially since cartoons live forever

[Chorus] Please I wanna Die, die, die We're all gonna Die, die, die (Pie, pie, pie) It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die (Why, why, why) Please, I wanna Die, die, die (No llama) Die, die, die (High, high, high) It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die

[Outro] It’s muffin time 'Cause I wanna die, die, die

[–]Lloyd2003 93 points94 points  (3 children)

Every day as I scroll through reddit, I dream that I will find an ad that isn’t locked. Today, my friends, is that day. I come to you all with an important message; a message that transcends time and space. I am a man of few comments, but I must take the opportunity now to open my fingers and pass this message onto you all. I am humbled to sit before you. The text will burn into your eyes. You may shed tears. I empathize with you all. My message, while brief, will hopefully fill you all with the knowledge I know you have the capability to retain. I want to thank you all. Thank you all for taking the time to read the comments on this unlocked ad. Thank you for stopping for just a moment to hear my message. My message isn’t difficult to comprehend, but I find it may prove most impossible to truly understand. By now I feel that the time has come to deliver my message. The message that I came here to tell. The message that I prayed I had an opportunity to deliver someday, though I must assert that I didn’t believe it would be a day like this. My message, friends, is as such: EAT ASS

[–]OwenTheNarwhal 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Orange nya nya style! Nya nya style!

I am an orange, people say that I'm annoying, say what you want, 'Cause I'm Certainly not boring

I hang out in the stables with a bunch of unicorns And i ride them into outher space Honking uni-horns!

I hang out with pear in the kitchen everyday we really like it here (We do) We're having fun times everyday even squash is here Marshmallow is really happy with his teddy bear (YaY!) his evil teddy bear! (YaY!)

And then he fought a monster bigger then (Hey) godzilla (Hey) A rock candy monster bigger than (Hey) godzilla (Hey) He just went nya - nya - nya - nya - nya - nya - nya - nya Nya! Nya! Nya!.....

Orange nya nya style! Nya nya style! Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Orange nya nya style! Nya nya style! Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,

Heeeeeyyyy! Flexxy grapey! (Oh) Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Orange nya nya style! Heeeeeyyyy! Midget apple! (I really don't know what's going on here guys...)

Everyone knows that I'm the best dancer But pear is pretty good When he takes a dance enhancer We dance anywhere we want Anytime we please 'Cause it's the only we know How to stay away from bees!

I hang out with pear in the kitchen everyday we really like it here (We do) We're having fun times everyday even squash is here Marshmallow is really happy with his teddy bear (YaY!) his evil teddy bear! (YaY!)

And then he fought a monster bigger then (Hey) godzilla (Hey) A rock candy monster bigger than (Hey) godzilla (Hey) He just went nya - nya - nya - nya - nya - nya - nya - nya Nya! Nya! Nya!.....

Orange nya nya style! Nya nya style! Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Orange nya nya style! Nya nya style! Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,

Heeeeeyyyy! Flexxy grapey! (Oh) Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Orange nya nya style! Heeeeeyyyy! Midget apple! (I still really don't know what's going on here guys...)

[–]mclaren675s 39 points40 points  (4 children)

Looks a little familiar to a popular big brand drone?🤔

[–]Dark_Birdie 15 points16 points  (1 child)

I have waited a long time for the opportunity to ask whoever makes these shitty clickbait ads. How are you not disgusted with yourself? If you are disgusted with yourself, be better and try not to fuck with everyone else. Just go away.

[–]ThatOneUsernamee 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Coming back here to read copypasta

[–]AllenLombax 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.

[–]Snowmalier 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Noone cares, you're annoying, get out.

[–]Slinkydonko 16 points17 points  (1 child)

720p????

What is this 2008?

[–]SpiriCat 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Cowboys can't shoot slow Or they'll end up below. When they need some help, They reach for the root beer shelf (Yee-haw!).

Cowboys can't shoot slow, Or they'll end up below, When they need some help, They reach for the root beer shelf.

YA THIRSTY PARTNER!?

[–]Shaantanu96 8 points9 points  (0 children)

How is this not a ripoff?

[–]finna_wesome 1 point2 points  (1 child)

The intent is to provide players with a sense of pride and accomplishment for unlocking different heroes.

As for cost, we selected initial values based upon data from the Open Beta and other adjustments made to milestone rewards before launch. Among other things, we're looking at average per-player credit earn rates on a daily basis, and we'll be making constant adjustments to ensure that players have challenges that are compelling, rewarding, and of course attainable via gameplay.

We appreciate the candid feedback, and the passion the community has put forth around the current topics here on Reddit, our forums and across numerous social media outlets.

Our team will continue to make changes and monitor community feedback and update everyone as soon and as often as we can.

[–]AlexGos 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Imagine you're truly immortal, in space.

You jack it. Eventually, you will ejaculate. That ejaculation will give you a tiny, miniscule amount of thrust.

You jack it again the next day. Hell, maybe that same day,  I don't judge. Same result. You shudder, a tiny amount of thrust.

Then again. And again. And again, over eons.

You will go faster and faster. Incredibly slowly,  yes. But faster still. This is how ion engines work. Tiny amounts of thrust,  but over long enough time scales you get serious results.

Eventually your jacking will propel you to an appreciable fraction of the speed of light. You'll be propelled across the cosmos at the end of light years long stream of gossamer wads.

[–]venuine_suraz 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I wanna see some naked dudes.

That's why I built this pool.

[–]Ajit-Pajouhesh 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Ok I don’t care

[–]SPONGEYSOAP 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Eat ass, smoke grass, downvote ads

[–]Frontzie 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Bepis.

That is all.

[–]ItsIds1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

MORE ADS I CAN COMMENT ON YAY NOW I AM HAPPY THANK YOU MAKER OF AD

[–]Bob_Om 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nobody is terrified of this drone, except people who get it bought for them by someone without a clue when they wanted the real thing.

Disappointment in a box.

[–]spicymangoslice 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Fuck you shit boys

[–]weeaboojone1574 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I hate women and minorities

[–]xotwodFR 2 points3 points  (0 children)

listen here mother fucker, this is too fucking scary, take this post down you god damn fucker

[–]ire4ever1190 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What? Does it have a bomb in it or something?

[–]Draketi 3 points4 points  (0 children)

why?

[–]emmademontford 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooow

[–]lb827 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just a mavic huh

[–]pranavsaudagar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good for you guys!

[–]SomeFreshMemes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Succ is dead